better an oops

Better an ‘oops’ than a ‘what if?’

Every single human on the face of the earth have made mistakes. Some, a simpel spelling mistake (hehe). Some, probably accidentally killed someone. They are part of human nature. (Mistakes, not murder).

Why do we beat ourselves up (literally and figuratively) (I’ve been known to kick things, thus injuring my poor, innocent little ankles), when we make a mistake? Hurt ourselves with overthinking and regret? Regret. I hate that word. Even the spelling of it is ugly. Regret.

When you have those late nights, your body is aching for sleep, and your mind decides it’s a good time to do a play-by-play of your most cringeworthy moments.

Sometimes the memories make you feel ill, sometimes they make you cry. Sometimes they make you piss yourself laughing in the middle of the night, in the dark, when you’re all alone.

I’ve made my fair share of dumb decisions. You know those ones that you just hope you’re going to get away with, that by some tiny little miracle, no one will know what you’ve done? And then, when they do find out, people have the audacity to say,

“What the hell were you thinking?”

And it’s like, well fuck me, obviously I was thinking I was going to get away with it and not have to explain myself.

Why Did I Do That? a novel by me, with special guest appearances by several alcoholic beverages

 

It got to a point where I got more yolo than I ever intended to be, because despite my bouts of crippling anxiety, I also had bouts of nah fuck it’s, thinking will these decisions make a difference in 5, 10, 15 years time?

I mean, potentially could ruin my future kids’ lives because paranoia from consequences…

But also, could potentially just be another classic laugh from Granny Rackers in the year 2064.

Refer back to rackers’ life tips: part 4 (legitimately a year ago) (where the fuck did that time go), point #7:
“a choice is a choice and once the choice is done the choice is chosen n u cannot change the choice so GET THE FUCK OVER IT AND if u really hate that choice then make BETTER choices and everything will be ok.”

I mean, I probably couldn’t have written it better myself.
ALSO rackers’ life tips: part 7, point #7:
“yeh nah mum used to be like ‘you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the things you did’ and I’d be like ‘nah but mum what if I really fucked up’ and now I realise that there is legitimately no point in a regret if it is what you wanted to do at the time, even if it was ridiculously stupid, yolo the fuck out of your life.”

Summed up: yolo.

In the grand scheme of things, there’s literally nothing you can do once you’ve acted upon something, besides wait for repercussions (if there are any), or just move the fuck on.

Always better an ‘oops’ than a ‘what if?’.

Just don’t kill anyone.

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Categories: Rackers

rackers

24 year old writer, just trying to find her way through the world through words and funny anecdotes.

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