You’ll have moments in life where everything is weighed down; not only your heart, your stomach and your shoulders and your head — when was the last time you were able to lift your head? When was the last time life didn’t feel so heavy? You have to say goodbye to people who are your people; who aren’t supposed to leave. Who are always supposed to be by your side.
And you’re standing in a church, the walls so high and the room so ridiculously and unfairly come to be so familiar in the past five years, and tears stream so easily down your face as if it’s second nature. Because it almost is.
Your heart breaks for your own family as you watch, yet again, everyone go through the same motions you’ve been through too many times before. Mere weeks later, your heart breaks again for a family you’ve known almost your entire life, for someone who was your first friend, for a woman who has lost the man who was her entire life.
But then you’ll remember, and see. What they have made, the impact they have left, and the love the air is still filled with. Because of them. For them. With them. And while it feels like the darkest time, and you may feel as if nothing is worth it — honestly why should we even try anymore? What is the point in it at all? Give me a good reason to begin to bother with life again.
Think about the laughter. The times they made you feel so special, your heart was lighter than you ever thought it could be. Because they were angels amongst humans, and now they’ve rightly earned their wings. They are above you, always with you, always right by your side. The air on a crisp, cold day is their kisses, and the beauty of the blue sky is their smile. The stars amongst the night are them laughing with the ones they’ve finally been reunited with. And the sunshine, burning through your skin, is their reminder that your heart will feel light again. Never in the same way, never for the same reason; but in every way worth it. For them. With them. Because of them.